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Anger, Shame & Hope
A mish-mash of what goes on inside my #busybrain. Welcome to a space I’ve created to befriend my anger and shame. All in the hope of living a life of joy and pleasure.
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I’m really angry today.
Anger wasn’t allowed for me growing up.
Unless it was about injustice.
Fight for justice. Fight for what is right.
But angry at you?
Angry at how things had gone?
Nope. None of that was allowed.
What did I have to be angry about?
Day ?? - 90 Days of Needs
I’ve got a different sense now how those words are likely another part. Not some telepathy with that part.
And when writing that out I head the voice.
Just take her out.
Just give her what she needs.
Two for one.
It’s like a test.
When they don’t get it right. She has the right to be angry. The right to feel let down. Justifiably upset that the world is a shitty place. Indignant at how shitty others are as humans.
It proves her right.
But I’m also not exactly sure what it’s right about.
“We both grew up in families where no one asked directly for what they wanted or needed. We learned to use manipulation and indirectness to get others to give us what we wanted.”